I have so many thoughts about the study this week. I'm not really sure which direction this post is going to take. I'm just going to let the words flow from my fingertips and see what happens.
Honestly, this is a tough week for me. I have people very close to me whose marriages have been destroyed because of infidelity, pornography, and emotional affairs. I can see how Satan works hard on couples. I truly think the unhealthy use of sexuality and intimacy is his biggest tool in destroying families. Pornography is at our fingertips, affairs are commonplace, and sex is considered to be something merely for pleasure. We need to strive diligently to keep our covenants and keep our families strong. We will not get support from the world, we must get strength and support from our Savior.
My most important takeaway from this week is about the importance of being prepared. We KNOW Satan is going to attempt to destroy us in this way. We need to be ready and prepared to defend ourselves and our families.
Dr. Goddard teaches of the progression of unfaithfulness. This is the process in which innocent behaviors turn to dangerous relations. Affections can grow through innocent behavior (like co-workers). Once an affection grows, it turns to "harmless" flirting, then to the relationship being declared special. At this point, opportunities are created to spend time with this special friend. Then the excuses start, the spouse becomes displaced, intimacy becomes exchanged with the special friend and faultfinding in your spouse arises. At this point, fantasies about your special friend start, and then the physical affection begins.
When I read through Goddard's progression of unfaithfulness, I thought back to a situation I was in when I was newly married and working at a bank 15 years ago. My job was to work alongside my supervisor (a married male) in a locked vault. It was just the two of us, all day, everyday. It was an innocent situation that could have totally become dangerous. Thankfully, my husband and I had been very open with each other about spending time alone with the opposite gender. We were aware of the dangers of it and were prepared to safeguard our marriage from Satan's temptations. I spent 2 years working in this locked vault with my supervisor. It was a situation in which unfaithfulness could totally have happened, but never did. I am certain it was because we were aware and prepared.
When I was a kid, my parents never talked about sex. Ever! I vowed to be a completely different parent to my own kids. I am very open with my children about sex and pornography. I think it is essential to be in the world we live in today. I think the only way we can safeguard our children is by being open with them. They need to know what they are up against, so they can seek the companionship of the Holy Ghost and be worthy to make and keep sacred covenants. My family studied Matthew 11:29 this week. The Savior said, "Take my yoke upon you". We taught our children that the only way we can get through any trials in this life, big or small, is by turning to the Savior for help.
If we are aware of Satan's tactics and we aware of how we can protect ourselves, we are prepared to go to battle with him. We have the Lord on our side, we must not forget to use Him. We cannot do it alone.
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